The one about finding your "specials"

This post was written by Katie and I for the Peace Corps Panama tri-annual magazine “La Vaina” inspired by the theme “This I Believe....”

“You are the books you read, the films you watch, the music you listen to, the people you meet, the dreams you have, the conversations you engage in. You are what you take from these. You are the sound of the ocean, the breath of fresh air, the brightest light and the darkest corner. You are a collective of every experience you have had in your life. So drown yourself in a sea of knowledge and existence. Let the words run through your veins and let the colours fill your mind until there’s nothing left to do but explode.” – Jac Vanek.

We’d take this quote one step further to include people, real life humanoids who affect the way you see and experience the world. As our pal, good ol’ Jac Vanek mentions, it’s what you learn from and take from your surroundings that truly influence your being. There are people who you engage with that influence your way of thinking and experiencing. But then there are those people who completely rewrite the way you live. Those are called the “specials.”  If you’re lucky enough to find a special in your life, hold on tight because they’ll teach you a million things. 

Bea, here is what you’ve taught me:

1. How not to freak out so much when lighting a gas stove.
2. That making a habit of sweeping the floor actually makes the house feel cleaner.
3. When you don’t like what someone is doing, sometimes the best thing to do is to be honest and actually tell them that (sass optional).
4. If your goal is to be the President of America, then you should tell people your goal is to be the President of America.
5. You can tell someone that you “hate” a piece of their clothing that you have never even seen, and it doesn’t mean that you love them any less.
6. If you like something about somebody, tell them to their face (it makes them feel really good and they will remember it when they are feeling down).
7. Even though a flag that you don’t want is half price, don’t buy it...because it’s a flag you don’t want.
8. If you can win the race, do it, because it’s called a “race,” not “a share circle.”
9. Being flexible, open-minded, and curious can co-exist with having strong opinions and expressing them without worrying about what others think.
10. Sometimes it’s better to stop talking and just say, “See you later freakazoid!”

Katie, this what I have learned from you:

1. The best way to play board games is in teams, especially when one half of the team takes Trivial Pursuit cards from the 1990s to bed and studies them.
2. Intellectually superior human beings listen to podcasts morning, afternoon and night. Music is for squares...except if it’s a parodied song played on the ukulele.
3. Ten minutes of volleyball a day does human good.
4. A good sense of humor, coupled with living by the phrase “Yes, and...” is the best way to become a improv specialist and better person.
5. If someone else does the cooking, you should always do the cleaning.
6. When someone says something really funny and you feel a huge belly laugh brewing, ride that wave, baby, ride it all the way!
7. Even though you may fully believe that paper books are morally superior and the only way to truly preserve the beauty of literature, it doesn’t make you a hypocrite when you buy a Kindle. 
8. If someone comments on a ten-year-old picture of you and says, “Wow, you’re wearing the same outfit!” it’s probably time to go shopping.
9. You can know everything about someone and still have stuff to talk about everyday.
10. Having a curious and analytical mind coupled with an uncanny ability to speak without ever taking a breath can lead to some of the most powerful and impactful conversations you’ll ever have with a friend who will eventually become your life mate. 

Specials are what make life great. They are the people who you can never get enough of, who you will always want close, whose glance you exchange whether or not they are physically present. You can meet them at camp, at track practice, on study abroad, while working at the deli, and in Peace Corps. Specials transcend age, class, and fashion sense. Wherever you happen to meet them, you’ll know quickly that they are a special. You start figuring out which one of you is Ernie and which one is Bert, you stop having to say "my sister" and can just say "Jenny" when telling a story. You will start wondering what they will look like at 40, 60, or 80 because you know you will still be looking at them in one way or another. We believe in the power of finding your specials.