Wednesday, August 19, 2015

On something I'll never forget

I’m sitting in my Close of Service (COS) conference that marks the 6-week countdown to the end of our service. These past two days have been a wild ride of emotions - sitting in a nice, air-conditioned and hot-water-providing hotel with everyone (well the 28 that remain) all together again for the first time in two years. In memory of our 2nd anniversary (tomorrow), we will provide you with a beautiful compilation of thoughts we all wrote down as part of an opening exercise for the conference. See if you can guess which responses are mine?

I’d like my community to remember me for:
Trying to stay positive
Brindaring baked goods
Compartiring well
Hugs and smiles
Standing up for myself and always dressing up
My banana bread and refusal to take crap from tigueres
For always being available to help others
Having manners and being okay with myself
My hugs and Zumba moves
Reading with kids, working hard and sharing
Buying garlic
My tenacity
My patience
Being a crazy dancer
Being a great cake baker and smiling
Insisting that children are people too
The ability to be sarcastic in Spanish
Smiles and providing a safe space
My persistence and vegetarianism
Keeping it real!

My biggest accomplishment:
Adding cement floors to houses and the community centers
Becoming a part of my community
Building relationships
Seeing my project partner lose weight and finally have control over her diabetes
Building a basketball court
The friends I’ve made
Being my own rock and learning Spanish
Becoming an adopted member of a Dominican family
Going from being scared of kids to “adopting” one and deciding I might want one someday
Helping girls NOT get pregnant
When I starting learning from my community, too
Deciding to extend, becoming an important person to influence youth
Being myself in my community (and getting’ work done!)
Leaving my groups behind as an NGO
Not leaving early
Making it to COS conference and working to bring a solar-powered library to the community
Making real friendships in my community
Living by myself and creating a life full of great, loving friendships
Finding a Dominican best friend J

Biggest challenge I overcame:
My site
To be okay taking risks and living 100% out of my comfort zone
Persevering even after lack of community motivation
 Coming out as gay in my community
Managing expectations and trusting I’m doing it right
Allowing my community to get to see me and not the double life I thought I had to have
Pico Duarte
Site change
Being myself in my community
Being insecure on what I could accomplish compared to others
Opening myself up to develop true relationships and friendships
Taking a posture of understanding Dominican culture
Learning to be okay with constant judgment, criticism and unsolicited advice
Lack of confidence in the beginning, worrying about possible judgment

Something I’ve learned:
Assertiveness and how to forgive
Tigeruaje
To be more resourceful
How materials are of little valuable compared to people
How to let go of the things I can’t control and how little I have control of
How to work with others effectively, even if the project doesn’t work out
How to trust in the goodness and kindness of human beings
Investing in the people who actually want to work with me
Opening myself up to others
Not accepting less than I deserve; help is given to those who ask
M’ ka pale kreyol
What I need and want out of life and the people around me
Letting go of the things I can’t control
Persistence, resilience and flexibility
Failure and tenacity
How to just be...

Something I’d like to forget:
Child abuse, verbal and physical treatment of animals
Feeling helpless and claustrophobic
Enduring endless sexual harassment
People that are just plain malcriado
The court building process
Being made to feel inferior for being a woman
Kids abusing my dogs
My experience at Clínica Abreau
The tigueres I made mistakes with...
Blaming it on “them”
The road to my site
Constantly feeling that I wasn’t good enough or doing enough
Racism towards Haitians
Always feeling different
Feeling unsatisfied with work even though I’m doing my best
Death of my dog, insecurities and my next door neighbor
The anger and frustration I feel thinking about my Dominican “counterpart”
Domestic violence/child abuse/dead dogs
Saying goodbye to my community

Something I will never forget:
Pico Duarte
Hammock time with the kids
All of you
How to say “YES!”
Helping plan my Dominican best friend’s wedding
You guys
Laughing at myself
One Year Celebration in Bahía de las Aguilas
The beauty of this country, the people, my horse and the love of my life
All the struggles that strengthened me
Every beautiful, romanticized moment
Going from surviving to living to loving


To my fellow members of 517-13-02, I love you guys. You’ve made me laugh, cry and helped me survive. We’re an impressive crew – go forth and set the world on fire!


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