This is my bittersweet last mensaje from Panama and subsequently, the end of my Peace Corps blog that has documented 2 years, 11 months and 23 days of living abroad. WOW.
When I accepted this Peace Corps Response position to work with the Floating Doctors in Panama, I had no idea what the year would bring. I didn’t know that I was yet to meet my two favorite Katies; create a robust Community Health Worker training that would eventually build-capacity for 20 indigenous all-stars; work with the best manager I’ve ever had; learn 50 words of Ngoberi; fall in love with Bocas del Toro, Panama; make new best Peace Corps friends; or eat one more years worth of rice and beans. I didn’t know that I’d work with an amazing organization of doctors and learn more about babies and birthing than I’d ever intended. How could I have know that I would travel to what would become my favorite country (Colombia) and favorite small mountain town (Boquete, Panama) in my young 25 years of life. Over the past ten months as a Response Volunteer, I got more than I knew I wanted, and in the process, continued my journey of growing professionally, personally and socially.
But in seven short days, the abroad chapter of my life will come to a close (for now!) and I’ll head back to the good old US of A to reconnect with bestest friends and resettle back into a culture where apparently I have to use Tinder to date and Uber to move around. My plans you ask? After I officially end my service on August 12th, I’ll fly to Medellin, Colombia to spend time with my favorite RuPaul’s Drag Race watching buddy from the Dominican Republic, Andy, now serving as a Response Volunteer there. And then it’s a six-week whirlwind bus tour (a la Hillary 2016) slash Tour de Friends. Tour locations include: Boston, Rockport/Lynn, New York, Philadelphia, Baltimore, DC, New York Round 2, Austin and San Francisco. And then this girl’s gonna get a job so if anyone is looking to hire a public health professional with international field experience in program management and excellent communication skills in Spanish and English with a proven ability to work collaboratively to develop practical strategies and solutions for global health project implementation, hit me up!
Here are six truths I’ve contemplated lately:
1) Hot water is heaven.
2) Living alone is the best thing ever.
3) If we had 25 hours in the day, we would have 1 extra hour to podcast.
4) You cannot trust a FitBit’s sleep monitor feature.
5) Coffee tastes better with cinnamon.
6) Cheese is God’s gift to mankind.
Here are the top eight things I’ve learned from living abroad for 2 years, 11 months and 23 days.
1) I don’t know a whole lot.
The flip side is that I know a lot about a little bit. I know how to use one liter of water to take a shower. I know how to kill chickens, pigs, cockroaches and termite infestations. I know how to be resourceful, stay in touch with people and ways to prioritize. I know how to speak Spanish fluently (!) and train community health workers. I know a lot more about emergency medical systems and telecommunications. But I do not know so many things. The world is huge and I’m continually in awe of the amazing things people are doing and learning. There is so much to know, and I am no longer the doe-eyed, self-important, chip-on-my-shoulder liberal arts school graduate who thinks I can change the world in two years...but I’m gonna keep trying.
2) I’m resilient.
At some point, everything will go wrong. I’ve hit rock bottom...and kept sinking. I thought I’d never make it out alive. I’ve had my emotions thrown around and my moral compass shattered. I wanted to give up. Sometimes I was so sick I would have rather died. Sometimes it was the heat that got to me, other times it was the people or the job or the food or the lack of guidance from superiors. But each and every time I’ve gathered my strength and come out on the other side. Humans are resilient and they will amaze you. Give yourself the credit you deserve for living this crazy thing we call life.
3) Learn to live with the cockroaches.
They’re not so bad, neither are the lizards nor the tiny frogs. The quicker you learn to kill them, the better you’ll feel about sleeping without a mosquito net at on a 100 degree night. Mosquitoes and sand fleas on the other hand, are the worst, so repellent up - using 100% deet as perfume for three years has yet to kill me!
4) I’ve learned to work for people, not things.
I prefer to have people, connections, relationships and friendships than things. I learned to open my heart so damn wide that I didn’t think anyone else could squeeze in, but they kept showing up and I kept loving. I made room for my community in the DR and my new people in Panama, while remembering to love the ones who kept me going back home. Our people and the connections we make within the networks we have and communities we occupy will make us whole – jeans, watches, cars, phones, nice cheese, and wine alone will not. Prioritize people and let them fill you up!
5) Making mistakes is good.
I never would have learned to speak Spanish fluently had I not been willing to mess up, look like an idiot, laugh at myself and learn from others. I needed to give in, lean in and go for it. Same goes for my projects. Yes, I messed up – over and over. My precocious advice: fail hard, fail fast and keep going.
6) Managing expectations is a must.
If expectations are low, everything has the potential to be great. Check yourself and your ides of what “should be.” If it’s not right – examine, is it the situation that sucks or my expectation of what the situation should be? Can I turn this experience into a positive? Let nothing be a loss, because nothing is. Don’t waste time regretting what could have been. Take action and enjoy what you’ve got. Manage your expectations and set your ship on a new course if the one you’re on isn’t working.
7) Be a good houseguest and an even better host.
Having spent lots of my service as both a guest and a host, I have come to have expectations from both. It takes minimal effort to be a good houseguest. It takes only slightly more effort to be a good host - invest the time and energy into becoming both. Being a houseguest: Disengage from your electronics, keep your shit tidy, play cards with your host, do the damn dishes. Being a host: Sweep your house, clean the toilet, stock up on coffee, make your guests smoothies. It’s as simple as that!
8) Live a good life.
Don’t let yourself get complacent about your space in the world. Occupy this world with passion, energy, confidence and purpose. Never stop learning, listening, trying, doing and becoming. Your mind is meant to grow, your body is meant to live. Going along with this is also the ability to know when to take care of yourself: to call a girls day, to hole up alone and binge on The Good Wife, to push yourself to go out dancing. Listen to yourself and treat yourself well. Drink safe water, stay hydrated and attend to infected bug bites.
My fabulous fans and faithful followers, thank you one million times over for your support and encouragement over the past three years. I have so much enjoyed being on this sweet sweet journey with you and I thank you for coming on it with me. Until the next adventure, my people! Over and out.
Xoxo, Bea/Bella/Vea
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